Keeping with the theme of kissing Murdgan’s ass over at Conceive This!, and copying her blogging genius, I’m stealing her Keyword Salad idea. My blog is still less than a month old, but I’ve been wanting to do this ever since day 1.Now, I can’t claim that I’ll be as funny as her, but I will try to give it shot.

(Murdgan, keep the blogs coming, I’m running out of things to say! Hmm, I’ve said Murdgan too many times lately, I wonder if next Keyword Salad will have that in it…)

“Gifted Male”

Naturally, this comes as no surprise to me (or Shelby). After all, I do have a certified letter from my HMO already informing me of my “special” condition. Too bad they can’t say the same for my sperm count.

“how the hell did you find this blog”

You’re reading this, you tell me!? Why would someone would search for this? Reminds me of one of my Dad’s favorite T-Shirts, a quote by Firesign Theater (totally ’60′s hippy comedy) that says “How can you be in two places at once, when you’re not anywhere at all.”

“sperm on her face”

Um… This is an infertility blog. If there is sperm going anywhere, it’s in a cup, catheter, a vagina. Regardless, it’s definitly not going to end up on her face.

“we started to wait for our uncle an hour ago and are still waiting”

You’ve been waiting for your uncle for an hour, and you’re asking Google where he is? Maybe you should pick up the phone and call him?  Were you the same person that searched for “dead spermicide” and found my blog? Now, if you were waiting for Aunt Flow and she’s the one who is late, that’s a different story.

“unordinary shelby”

Shit! You didn’t need Google for that, I could have told you that! Hell, we’ve kept the same roll of paper towels on our bedroom floor for weeks and now it’s just the cardboard tube part.

“my mind is a mind that i have grown to know and my eyes can’t conceive a world that can not grow”

There is some serious emo shit going on in this search query.

“wife doctor hate fuck”

Well, Shelby has spread eagle in from of many doctors, some of which we were less than fond of. However, there wasn’t too much hate going on there. In fact, one of them even knocked her up. So I’ll wrap this up with a quote from P.aris H.ilton in this situation: “That’s hot.”