Sticking it to her
Posted by Mr. ShelbyApr 9
Sometimes I wonder what people would think if they walked into our house during our IVF cycle. Syringes, vials, and alcohol wipes are spread across our kitchen table as we get ready to do our daily shot of P.rogesterone. There’s also huge tupperware container of used syringes at the other end of the table. To the uninformed eye, we are obviously, hard core druggies preparing for our next fix.
With 7 IUI’s and 1 IVF, I’ve become a master of administering injections. Our IUI injections were easy, just a small needle below the belly button. The first few tries, Shelby looked at me with mock suspicion and wondered if I actually injected the medicine into her body. I assured her every time, that yes dear, I really do want a baby and am not just here for the ride. I can’t help it if I’m the zen master of injections. When it came time for our first intramuscular injection, Shelby put up a little more resistance than I expected. I swear, I thought the girl was going to pass out. She iced her skin until it was blue. It was almost painful for me to touch the injection site. I kept telling her that frost bite isn’t going to make this any better. I even had to bust out my “big boy” voice to encourage her to STOP MOVING. After the vial was emptied into her body, she blinked at me. “That was it? That didn’t hurt at all.” Yep – that’s me! Mr. “Injection Master” Shelby.
After a few weeks of daily, and then weekly injections, we really had our 8:00 PM routine down. It’s easy; Ice, fill the vial, convince Shelby that it won’t hurt, inject the medicine, walk the dog, Shelby would take a shower, I’d remark the injection site with a permanent marker, and we’d go bed. Rinse and repeat. As long as we remembered to keep her hips marked, we’d be good to go. In the middle of everything, Shelby got some well-deserved TLC and treated herself to a massage. If only I could have been a fly on the wall when her masseuse stopped the massage and gaped at the marking on Shelby’s hips. After a few days of marking her hips, I got bored with simple circles. Eventually I would mark the area with smiley faces, demon faces, and the occasional “stick it to her here” circle-shaped message. My favorite was the devil on the left hip and angle on the other. It was great and I’d get away with it every time. “Really, I swear! It’s just a circle this time. Promise!”
Now that we’re officially done with our shots, needles and vials (for now), I find myself missing it in some small way. For a few minutes a day, there was something intimate and sensual about marking her hips. I enjoyed doing my part in helping her create life inside her, even if it was to simply draw a buck-toothed smiley face.
Side Note: I would like to point out that I used the phrase “injecting Shelby” many times without being dirty. Two points to me, the injection master!
After 5 years, we still walk the path of infertility. 7 IUI's, 1 miscarriage, 1 IVF and tens of thousands of dollars later we find ourselves pregnant. The path is still not clear, but we take it one step at a time.



11 comments
Comment by Another Dreamer on April 9, 2009 at 2:37 pm
Kinda makes me wonder what was going through the masseuses mind, lol.
Comment by shelby on April 9, 2009 at 4:55 pm
Actually, my masseuse was, I think a bit conservative, so when she found my shoulder tattoo, she remarked with feigned enthusiasm, “oooh, a tattoo. that’s… nice.” After she found the more interesting patterns on my bum, she later told me she figured them to be more strange tattoos. Yeah. I’m totally into the ass tattoos. lady. This was also the lady who thought it was a good idea to tell me about how it took her one cycle to get pregnant after she learned of my infertility. Yeah. Let’s just say I haven’t returned.
By the way, I would like to point out that my particular ass is much smaller than that pictured. Just didn’t want to mislead, ya know?
Comment by shelby on April 9, 2009 at 4:56 pm
oops, I meant much bigger. Haha. My ass is MUCH bigger. That was such a Freudian slip (or wish).
Comment by Betsy on April 9, 2009 at 5:56 pm
Yeah, apparently I don’t wash my left side as well as my right, because my husband pointed out last night he has to keep re-drawing the right side ass tattoo but not the left side. Great, now I’m dirty on top of being bloated, bitchy and tired!
Shelby – I have a feeling your first comment was more accurate!
Comment by Another Dreamer on April 9, 2009 at 7:18 pm
Shelby, LOL!!!
Comment by nishkanu on April 9, 2009 at 8:20 pm
My Mr. loved to make the pictures too, and it was a good way to make me laugh through the tears. My favorite was a piggy on the left hip and a space alien on the right. Glad to hear we are not the only strange ones who think this is a good time.
Comment by Kate on April 9, 2009 at 8:58 pm
This is so great! My husband is kind of nervous about the shots…we are getting ready for our first round of IVF next week. I have been journaling our experience, and just recently tranlating it to a blog. http://onegoodswimmer.wordpress.com/ I’d love to get your comments if you have a chance along the way to read as we move through the process. I have a few more posts to get up before we really begin next week, but we’re almost there.
I’ll be adding you to our blogroll as well…
Best,
Kate
Comment by Mr. S on April 10, 2009 at 8:23 am
Man, I’m so glad I started a site. This is so much fun! Thank you all for commenting!
@Betsy – Now that you mention it, I think Shelby was the same way. I offered to help her in the shower, but she declined!
@Nishkanu – Birds of a feather flock together, I guess! I think I would have gotten smacked if I drew a piggy on Shelby’s butt!
@Kate – Good luck! I’ll add you to my list of daily reads. All the best!
Comment by Murgdan on April 10, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Nice! I commend your superior stabbing ability! Mad skills, mad props.
Comment by musicmakermomma on April 12, 2009 at 9:31 pm
Wow, I am going to demand more exciting “butt art” – my PIO shots are pretty boring these days (the only exciting thing being that we are STILL doing them!) But even though the only interesting visuals on my backside are bruises, it is a time we bond, in a weird way.
Comment by banditgirl on April 15, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Maybe you two could start an ass-tat business? Real decadent, alternative, avantgarde style? Could help repay those loans…